Growing up...

Forest randomly texted me: “I hope you know you’re going to be a very successful person.”

I replied with: “You really think so?”

And his response: “I know so, Bree.”

I was going to reply with: “Well you should give me a hint as to what I’m supposed to be in life, because I have no idea.”

But I realized that made me sound like a little girl asking someone what she should be for Halloween. This is something I need to decide for myself. This isn’t a one day occasion, this is my life.   

And as much as I’d love for someone to just tell me what I was going to amount to in life, for someone to tell me my destiny.. It’s something I need to figure out myself. And I haven’t the slightest idea. 

Hate

I’ve always hated and been strongly against bullying. And up until now, I’ve never known just how much it could hurt.

Granted, I’ve been bullied all of my life, (for multiple reasons I do not wish to bring up at this time) but never, never to this extent. Which brings me to realize that cyber bullying has got to be one of the worst ways to bully people. 

Now, in the time it takes to block six or seven people, you could have already: walked away, entered your house, hung up the phone, or punched someone in the face (if that’s how you do things). 

People gang up on you, and they gang up on you bad. They don’t stop until… well, I don’t know when they stop, honestly.

My story:

Last night I posted a comment on someone’s picture, it wasn’t a rude comment and it wasn’t directed toward him in any negative way. But because people didn’t like the artist the comment referred to they attacked me. These people don’t know me, I don’t know them.. I barely know the person in the picture I commented on. 

They comment after comment tore me fucking down. And when I tried to stand up for myself, it got even worse. And when I made another attempt to stand up for myself, they started bashing every bit of me. My appearance, how I think, what I do… I felt so helpless. I was never rude in any of my three comments. And at the end of the whole thing there was over sixty comments. Sixty heartless comments aimed towards me all because I posted that one comment. 

Those people don’t know me or how my life is, but they still chose to tear me from limb to limb.

Last night, I lost any shred of hope I had left in humanity. 

I only hope that whoever gets it next is as strong as I am.

I have the type of dreams that people write books about.

I keep telling myself that one day I will remember my great adventurous dreams for more than 5 seconds after I wake up, but still only bits and pieces come back up in my thoughts. 

And I mean really, my dreams are so great sometimes. I don’t even know how to explain how great they are. But I shall try:

• They’re always adventurous and very exciting, a lot of things happen. 
• I find that my mind makes the plot run on just perfectly. 
• They almost always have something to do with saving a bunch of people, a small group of people, or solving a great mystery. 
• They play out A LOT like movies. (Scenes of romance, great emotion, epic fights, and great endings.)
• They always take place in the past. (Middle ages, the age of pirates, western times, etc.)
• Yes, I do have some supernatural and zombie dreams. (None that I remember the plot of.) *sigh*

I’ve come to the conclusion that I very well do have the mind of a writer. I’ve just never put it to use. (Aside from the various short stories I wrote in elementary school.)

I’ve always, always loved reading and writing. Granted, I’ve written tons and tons of poetry in my days… poetry is just not my thing.

People always tell me that I have a way with words. I have a very large vocabulary, but it’s not that I know many words, it’s that I know how to use them. 

So all in all, I WILL write a book one day. A really, really great book. I’m making it a life goal. A dream that AM going to pursue. I won’t give up on this. Nope, not this time. 

My baby, Jagen.

He stuffed each and every piece of his food in those cute chubby cheeks of his. (:

Ah.

I feel.. so alone right now.

My very first post.

I'm so excited to start this wonderful new blogging adventure.
I'm a teenager with a tumblr and I actually want to start blogging bigger and better things.
It feels weird to write out and post something that you know no one will see. Ha!
Oh well. Soon. (: